Accountability: What has it got to do with loving yourself?
What is accountability?
The fact or condition of being accountable. Responsibility. Answerable.
Accountability just doesn’t apply to the workforce it applies to life and everything we do in life.
Accountability is how we react to a situation. How we react is the law of karma, reaction to action.
There seems to be a distinct lack of accountability in our lives and indeed the world today. If we are not accountable then we are free to blame. Blame people, blame situations, blame luck, blame the universe or God. Blame is an epidemic and it comes from a lack of accountability. We are not defined by other people or situations we are defined by how we see ourselves and our own self esteem. If a situation doesn’t go as we think it should, what happens? We blame. If someone doesn’t act or speak as we think they should, what do we do, we cut down or make the other person responsible, deflect to protect ourselves. Look at the “keyboard warriors” cutting down to make themselves feel better or feel elevated. Nothing or no-one can make them accountable.
The important thing to remember is that we are defining ourselves by what they are saying. They are not making us feel anything, we are allowing them to define us by the way we react.
I was in a situation not so long ago where someone, due to their own unhealed energy or unhealed wounds, decided to try to cut me down and turn what I said into a different meaning, trying to make me look silly and wrong. I had choices. I could have retaliated and tried to cut her down. I could have stewed on it and talked about her and the incident to anyone who would listen or I could log in to myself see if any of what she said landed anywhere in or on me and if it did look at my unhealed energy or wound and applied soothing cream to it. Thereby healing myself. The first two are blame the last one is self-love. Loving myself enough to heal myself. Knowing it wasn’t about her but really for me to look at. I made myself accountable for me and me alone. I cannot make anyone else accountable, this is for them to do and look at.
“I am responsible for myself and my actions” should be our new mantra.
Let’s look at the two different paths we can take.
1. The blame path.
What happens if I take the blame route? I am outraged or I retreat into self-pity space and victim space. I then become outraged at being treated this way i.e. how dare she. I then justify what happened with statements like “well of course she is just a b@#&h”, we all should hate her. Thereby putting her down and trying to elevate myself. Revenge at all costs. My wounds never heal and I justify the fact that they don’t have to. I can walk through life with gaping wounds and no-one will notice, right? Mmmmmmm. Wrong.
2. Self-healing path.
I log if the statement landed anywhere with me and by this, I mean, did I feel hurt, angry, victimised, unfairly treated etc. If it did I find where it was in my body and I apply self-love to it. Place my hands on that part of me and breath in love and healing. For example, if the space had red arrows coming out of it, place your hands on that part and rub around in circles breathing in love and healing until the arrows go away.
Try it, it really works.
Send love to yourself. We hear a lot about sending love and light to the other person but we never send it to ourselves. We must start with ourselves first. Heal yourself then try and heal the world.
That is accountability right there. You have made yourself accountable for your own self-healing and have left others to theirs. Being accountable in this way will make you feel so much better and when you feel better about yourself, the world around you will seem more loving. When you react with your healed self to the world the world will give you positive outcomes in return. What we give out we get back really does apply and it all starts with making ourselves accountable. When we do we elevate our self-esteem.
We will show the world us being comfortable in our own skin.